My goodness, I do believe that confrences are over rated! If you read my last post you will see my fears of the day before my confrence with my sons first grade teacher, and the many months of worry even before that. My “CONFRONTATION” was just that. We laid it all on the line. No stone was unturned.
Did I have things to worry about? I certainly did! Did I get emotional? For sure! Did I cry? Affirmative! Did my husband get a bit vocal? Check that box too! Did I make the teacher tear up? UMMMM that would be a BIG yes!!!! Did we get it all out in the open? Heck yeah! Is anything going to change? UNFORTUNATELY not.
However, on those notes. I would like to let you know, that being out of the “working force” for the past 4 years, did kind of leave me on more of an unprepped open field of oppurtunity. When I was working, I sold insurance. You know the entire line, small life policies, large life policies, auto, fire and health insurance, I even got into the banking side of things. I absolutely loved it. I found that loving that kind of job, was not necessarily about how much you could sell, but how you could help a person, completely provide for their families. Insurance is certainly NOT about what you can provide someone at THIS PRESENT moment. It’s about what you can provide for thier loved ones on their behalf for it that WHATEVER moment ever comes. (I’m sure you wonder what all this has to do with confrences)
I keep thinking about the confrence that we had, and the expectations that the teacher had on my son. The expectations I had of his teacher. The way that I want to prepare Jaden for his future. I don’t want to leave Jaden blind sided. I had no problem when I was working telling others to prepare for their future. My favorite saying to someone was “are you okay with leaving your family with nothing tomorrow, if you don’t make it home?” (I’m sure you are thinking… wow, is she serious? No way she ever said anything like that.. yep I did! ) For me, this is the same thing that I was thinking, from both points of view….
His teacher said “I didn’t mean to frighten you, I just meant that holding him back in the first grade is something to consider”. I guess after having time to think things through…. she was really trying to say….”are you okay with Jaden’s education leaving him unprepared to start next year in the 2nd grade, if he is not ready to leave 1st grade?” Was she really saying anything to us, that I hadn’t said to my pupils I was talking insurance to?
I think that the standards are to high still. Do I think that it should matter if a 1st grader uses a capital letter here and there in their spelling words? Absolutely not! Am I the teacher? Heck no. However, I thought that she should hear my voice, and how dedicated we really are to Jaden’s education. I wanted her to know how hard he works, each and everyday. I think that she now sees that we are very much commited to Jaden’s education. We are not the parents that just get up and send the kid a packing to school. We are not letting him get by with slacking, or pushing the school work aside for extra playtime. However we ARE the parents that say, school work comes first. We work really hard at letting him know that we are here for him, and take a lot of time away from doing other things so that the work does come first for his education. I think that she sees us as parents who are doing everything in the best interest of the education, but the education system can’t let him down either. The education system has to find a way to better prepare families for what they are being faced with. I find it very hard to believe, that a parent would not take the time to help their child succeed…. I think that is an extremely sad thought….. I just wish that when his grades started to make him a candidate for failing, the system would have contacted us, cause in a 1 month time his 1st teacher said he was doing so much better, and then a new teacher and holidays come, and we find out the new teacher wants him to repeat 1st grade….. something very disturbing is wrong with that picture.
After sitting down with the teacher. I believe that we now have a more open line of communication. I think that she now understands my emotional concerns for Jaden, and that maybe makes it a bit easier for her to relate to him. It has not, and will not change how her grading will be. Although, we now have him in a system that she is going to be spending some one on one time in class with him, to help him more! And we at home… per his teacher and us talking… have decided that Jaden does just need to be a kid…. aka: playtime…. he hasn’t had much of that because of homework each night, so now we try to get the majority of it done on Mondays, so that he can have the rest of the wk, for just spelling and daily reading… and Jaden time.
BIG note…. he got 80% on last wks spelling words! And also, 9 of 13 correct on his challenge words! So proud of him!!!
I also wanted to say thank you to those who made comments on the Facebook page! It’s nice to get support, and see it… I couldn’t reply back then, but want to make sure that you know, that I appreciate any and all comments on my blogs!